Crazy world... insane thoughts
It's like the title says...

Body & Soul

Wednesday, April 21, 2010
this week has been one of those that comes about once in a lifetime.
well my grandmother (Badi Amma) could only have died once.......
Dadi aged 15
This is how I'd like to remember her... the way one remembers a beautiful person

This is not so much about her as it is about a sensitization with death and the mortal coil. I'm nowhere near attaining Moksha with the way things stand at this time. But  here's the set of thoughts in this head...

I see a new face of life every day.This time I saw death.

My camera stayed in its bag as I let the mind' eye record all that went on. A part of me wants to describe a lot of emotions verbatim as i felt them. Another part of me says that this blog is read by people of all ages. Sensitivity creeps in.

I had not spoken with my Granny for sometime now. A host of reasons abound but that's the way it was. I loved her in my own way - without saying that it was as much love as it should have been. Her death is my loss since I couldn't set a lot of things right. Every family has it's sets of internal fissures and frictions. Ours is no different. And she thrived on it. She got cannier as age went by - experience they call it.

When I grow older and we have kids and they have theirs - I trust my grandchildren will remember me better. The way I remember my Nana and Nani. When we have kids we will raise them as my folks raised Tina and I with the capacity to think freely and act as such. I trust I shall never have to raise a hand on them, like my father before me and unlike his father before him. I hope our children never have to run away from home to become something in life. We will cherish their dreams as ours rather than impose on them and force extreme measures at their end. I promise to love all grandchildren equally no matter how much money their parents have. Also hope that Sups and I will love all our kids equally and not differentiate on the basis of gender or their financial status'.
I trust my Dada-Dadi are listening in on this lil piece of conversation.... will help them in their next cycle on earth...

taking about an eulogy!!

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Wednesday, April 14, 2010
...the key determinant to why we do what we do.
All actions are judged by their motives. If it were any other way, generals would be mass murderers, Income tax officials would be cheats and thieves and even a judge would be a murderer. The country would stop expecting self-sacrifice from its citizens and even the holiest of prophets would be guilty of misguiding millions.

Rat poison added to the rice to kill the rodents is a noble motive (no matter what Maneka says) but the same combination fed to a person would be guilty as sin. The question that comes to my mind is what is the right motive and what’s not.

I look for motives in actions around me at work.
There’re folks and then there are THOSE folks.
It’s like looking for patterns in a game.
Agendas abound - mostly of a personal nature. It’s difficult to get a hold of those which are beneficial to the organization and those beneficial to an individual or a group of individuals.

I guess that’s why they call it experience. Here’s what my experience tells me.
I respect that firm handshake - not too tight though.
Follow it up with a straight eye connected talker whom I would prefer to the schemer and one with all those extra slippery ideas
If an idea doesn’t sound right the first time you hear it - let it go.
Gut feelings should be respected.
Ego centric individuals should be controlled before they bloat up.
Many of the Top Guys thrive on sycophancy - there’s nothing you can do about it - except avoid it. Deliver results and your attitude will be accepted.

It all boils down to your motive...
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a window within

Wednesday, April 14, 2010
sitting by the window as the train whizzes along. The superfast express and the cattle class compartment are good remedies for a mind hovering on the edge. I have conjectured how it would come to this, many a time. The end was never in doubt - just the where and the when.
showers of blessings

The balmy air outside transforms to a good wind and I make my way to the door feeling like some rain. The weather gods do not disappoint.
There is a smell of freedom in the air and it washes over me in gusts of rain. This freedom is not one earned lightly. I had to change gears and perspective - easier written than actually done.

It was only when I decided to stop chasing money and love - they came to me of their own free will. It was only when I became comfortable with me - that others did likewise.  I recast the word "ambition" into a "calling" - then success followed me. Happiness in what I'm doing and being able to derive satisfaction in doing it right - that's pretty much turned this life around.
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Do pal

Sunday, April 04, 2010
do palon ki thi ye dilon ki dastaan
phir chal diye - tum kahaan, hum kahaan
till ears do us part

There comes a time when we part ways.
Sometimes it is only to meet again...

.. then again there are those partings which are forever.
.. those tracks shall never cross again.

All that is left are a few memories and moments.
Cliched as the opening lines may sound - they sum up a lot of my life.
Nothing seems to last forever - as this stone rolls on.
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Arjuns Tryst with the camera's Fan Box


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    Gurgaon, India
    traveling life's quaint paths and making my own destiny...

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