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The impatient patient.

I understand that life is not about a quick fix or a rush. It is about following your dreams across the mountains of mist, following that rainbow , where a pot of gold awaits you.
Life is about a steady growth punctuated by moments of realization which add depth and dimensions to the movement. It's like a video game where each successive level gains the player access to increased weapons and goodies to combat the challenges therein.
These increased weapons are not guns and bombs. They are the strength that comes with wisdom. Wisdom to understand, mull over the facts, analyse the circumstances and take decisive action.
Action, to my way of thinking, must necessarily be decisive. Half hearted action yields not the desired results.

Patience is one of the signs of attained wisdom. It is also a sign of maturity.
All the wise men and women say so.
In my heart of hearts I agree with them.
And now as I grow older - I should be more patient. Sometimes i'm not. It makes me wonder - the analysis is generally post facto.
Then there's that unknown rule of destiny & fate playing their hands in my life.
The wheel weaves as the wheel wills - so says one of my favorite books. The weaves of our lives intersperse with one another. People we didn’t know till the morning- become close. Friends to enemies and vice versa.

I am definitely an impatient patient.
Trying to jump levels sometimes ,in this game. Attempting to use a cheat code even when I know that none will work.
No - i'm not lazy. In fact the very opposite of it. I work extremely hard to succeed and win. Sometimes that "win" is the only comprehensible goal.
Mallik, a friend, once commented ," you are always competing. You are in competition with all those around you." So I am.
But more than anyone else - I compete against me. I lose sometimes. I do learn - never to repeat!
The questions I should stop and ask myself are, where am I headed in such haste.? Is it fame, glory, riches, the arms of a beautiful woman? What's in it for me? Why this selfish streak of self obsession where I disregard thoughts for others? What was the last good thing I did for anyone (other than myself)?

Answers - patience !!!

They will come with each level. Starting to ask the right questions is a good beginning.
I drown in the melody of Vivaldi ad his four seasons as I search the path. As that peters out - dire straits belt out "walks of life".
So very poignant - I must observe - and extremely tuned to the moment.


Anonymous said…
This is a good piece :)
And yes, I do agree with the main theme. Patience is a virtue that many seek, but only few acquire.
Good luck in your quest.
Mallik said…
Now that you tried competing with yourself, try harmonizing with yourself.

Life is hell of a trial and error.
Arjun said…
Yes Mallik
I'm trying that. It's much tougher than it sounds - actually!!!

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